Are You Struggling With Self-Doubt and Low Self-worth After an Affair?

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Handling an affair in your relationship is perhaps one of the hardest things any couple will need to handle. There are obviously many relationship issues that have to be worked out, but one thing I find many ladies deal with after an affair is the feeling that they haven?t any self esteem or self-respect.

But thoughts like these are not going to help heal and put things back together. Here are 3 tips to help you regain your confidence, self image, and respect after you find out your husband had an affair.

Claim Responsibility ? Naturally, I?m not trying to tell you that you are accountable for your man?s choice to cheat. That was in the end a choice he made. However , you have to realize you?re responsible for how you feel and how you respond to your daily life.

Certainly you?ve known two different individuals that react against the same thing in very different ways. This is because of their individual life experiences and what they think about themselves, others, and the world. The point is you can decide how to react to the turmoils in your life, and you alone are responsible for your own happiness and state of well-being. So long as you rely on something outside of yourself to feel good, you will always be at the whims of fate and other?s fickle emotions.

Accept That It Happened ? Another problem that many of us have is that they resist the undeniable fact that their spouse cheated. They struggle with the fact and try to push it away. Nonetheless this is not the fact of what happened.

You should accept that it actually did happen. This, of course, doesn?t mean that you need to be okay with it. You can still feel bad about your current position, but by learning to accept that it happened rather than resisting it, hiding from it, or alternatively pushing it away, you can charge up lots of emotional energy. You can use this energy for more helpful things like dealing with the emotions or taking your life and your relationship in a positive direction.

Shed Pessimism ? Chances are good that if there was an affair, then there?s a problem in your relationship. Maybe the two of you are experiencing emotional distance from one another. Maybe there is acrimony between the two of you. Or perhaps the two of you fought and disagreed often.

The next thing you need to do to start enjoying your life again and rebuilding your relationship (if you choose to), is to start correcting these problems in your relationship. This is the key to releasing bad feelings and starting to have a good time and enjoy life again.

Handling an affair is difficult, and in several respects the toughest part is rebuilding your own sense of self and confidence. But with these 3 tips, you will be well on the way.

If you found this helpful and you?d like to learn more reasons for infidelity, please check out my Marriage Sherpa review to discover why your partner cheated and what you can do about it.

Source: http://canarymagazine.net/relationships/cheating-relationships/are-you-struggling-with-self-doubt-and-low-self-worth-after-an-affair/

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